|Tank Dempsey vs Nikolai Belinski|
|Release Date||January 5th, 2014|
|Next||Cleverbot vs SmarterChild|
|Rappers||Tank Dempsey |
The Demonic Announcer
|Cameos||Vladimir Lenin |
Tank Dempsey vs Nikolai Belinski is the first installment of JMB Rap Battles. It features a story battle involving most of the characters from Call of Duty: Black Ops Zombies mode. It was released on January 5th, 2014.
Britney as Fluffy (video)
Hello freakbag, welcome to the Nacht Der Untoten,
I'm gonna rip you up like all those letters that you wrote in,
1918, I can run like a Tank, yet you still haven't learned,
Tell me Chernov, have you ever recovered from that burn?
I'm going ballistic on Belinski, the Lenin supporting queer!
Fucking mess with me again, I'll use your guts as Bandolier!
I'll circumcise you, then impale your throat with your own dick,
If I can bite open a cage, I can handle this prick!
After I gut you alive, I'll show you the meaning of Red Army!
Lyrically drink you like vodka before you have chance to scar me!
Even Stalin himself cannot stare into my eye!
Your rhymes are just as fishy as your Quick Revive!
I'll slaughter your daughter, and then I'll slaughter your father,
Throw them in my wives' graves, so you don't have to bother!
You have no family, no fame, I'll take your kills in account,
Why don't you ask your friend Peter if he wants to hang out?
I'm Takeo, and I'm taking you! Flowing like a broken faucet,
Stop writing your letters and come out of your skeletal closet!
Nikki, you're only feared because it's scary how much you're a wussy!
I think you're all just jealous I'm the one who sliced pussy!
Dempsey, no need to be upset you have an STD Flopper,
If I'm gonna take you out, it's death before dishonor!
You bitches are just glitches who do nothing but lag!
I'm out, with the help of the Emperor, I defeated you fags!
The Doctor is here to heal your terrible burns!
Think you can all slay zombies? Well now it's my turn!
Leck mich! This story's about ME, not you communists!
Now I'mma tear Belinski's coat redder than it already is!
Ay Takeo, what the Verruckt do you think you can do?
I'll send you back to the Moon 'cause you're all out of Juju!
I'll butcher any bitch who thinks he can clinch the win!
Screw vodka! I'll drink your blood right off the hands of Richtofen!
The Demonic Announcer:Edit
The four of you just stop and let the true master take this,
Without my aid, you guys wouldn't make it past Round Six!
Spawning Insta-Kill, Double Points, Fire Sale, Carpenter,
Max Ammo, Nukes, you better fucking prevail!
To the one and only entity that allows you to live,
You guys have took it too far and I shant forgive!
Bow down to me! I'm the one who makes the choices,
You all need to stop fighting because I cannot stand your voices!
You don't like the sodas? Get over it and have a cup!
Or I'll shove an Iron Fist up your ass and provide you Anti-Power Ups!
So before the players are crying about the fact they're gonna die,
Why don't you guys just work together and everything will be fine!
Greetings, weaklings, in this rap you'll be eaten alive!
And regretfully, I must inform that none of you will survive!
Once the clock strikes 1:15, prepare to get sent back,
I'll vicously attack, Maxis is gonna leave you maxed!
It's time to distort you into proportions like a radio message,
Don't mess with Group 935 unless you're looking for some wreakage!
This emcee's ill like an MD, so you better make no sound,
I'm ripping you fools up, call me Samantha's Hellhound!
Daddy, I'm scared, I don't wanna be alone!
Hide me from these strangers, I just wanna go home!
I'll just shelter in my room, and just hold on to Teddy,
Here, play with Fluffy, I hope you're ready!
It's Fluffy! Canine emcee, going hard on this bitch,
I'm like a hound out of hell, rhymes about to switch,
My bark's louder than my bite, y'all about to glitch,
I'll be growling, howling, undead, it's about time to ditch!
Braaaaainssss, my flow is insaaaaaaannneee,
You can't break my lyrical chaaaaain, 'cause I'm bringing the paaaaain,
The undead will reign! My rhymes are hot see, burning disses like a Nazi,
You can't defeat this zombie, shake your brains out like Yahtzee!
Call me Wreck-It-Ralph, 'cause I'll destroy your fixed barrier,
You can't escape my Wrath, spawn away, I make shit scarier!
We're at a verbal war, my flows are like brains, 'cause I munch rhymes!
You know you're dead when I'm feasting on your head like it's lunchtime!
Guys, in order for us to win, we have to work together!
We're gonna show these freaks in every way that we're better!
Agreed! Let's charge these communists and Pack-A-Punch and beat their ass,
After we finish them off, we can celebrate with a brand new vodka glass!
Come on, boys, we're gonna show them whose boss!
No more experiments after they've seen that they've lost!
When together, our unstoppable force cannot be broken!
These schiesse ficks won't win, they ain't Rich like 'tofen!
Step back Dr. Maxis, your shit is just wack!
Using zombies to protect yourself? You sure got no sack!
And who's this little bitch Samantha? Ha! What a wreck!
She'll scream when we break that pussy dog's neck!
Good work team! We know for sure that they've lost,
Now let's see what the hell is in this Mystery Box!
It's time to pay your toll!
Just like I steal this box, I'LL STEAL YOUR SOULS!